New Year's Eve. Party night. I've never really bought in. I prefer a quiet night at home, a perfect cup of tea at midnight, and a peaceful night's sleep followed by baked eggs for breakfast (a family tradition) and the Rose Parade on TV. I suppose the popular thing to do is engage in retrospective, but I prefer perspective--understanding the past as a way of grounding in the present and strengthening for the future. I'm coming off of the toughest semester of my professional career. Good in many ways, but also very difficult. Heaviest teaching load ever, heavier than I wanted and heavier than I knew I could handle, even without knowing that my mom (and once, also, my dad) would be in and out of the hospital the whole semester with life-threatening illness. The good things: a new grandbaby born end of summer. Amazingingly wonderful studnets and really fun classes. A fall break trip to Indiana to see my kids and grandkids. A trip to Australia. Good--very, very good. Christmas. Wonderful but disjointed. Usually, we decorate all at once the day after Thanksgiving. This year, with the Australia trip in the works, decorating was slow and piecemeal, and the celebratory mood and feelings followed suit. Grading was huge and overwhelming, extending until only a few days before Christmas and leaving little time for holiday preparation. Still Christmas was wonderful because my whole family was together. Unbounded faith. Unbounded love. At this exact moment, the clock strikes midnight to begin 2007. Fireworks pop away outside; my dogs are surprisingly unperturbed. Carina and Libby are peacefully asleep in the baby room and the office. We're cherishing every moment of the ten days they are staying with Grammy and Pops while Miah and Marcie lead worship at a Missions Asia conference in Thailand. Tonight, Libby listened to Marcie talk to her on the phone. She was so intent on listening, hugged the phone, said, "Mama!" repeatedly," and was almost inconsolable afterward. I have to confess that my Grammy's heart was warmed when she finally decided that I was an acceptable source of comfort and settled into my arms to cuddle and fall asleep. Carina loved the computer videos of stories read by Mommy and Daddy, and thankfully they left her feeling filled up rather than bereft. She's a master at manipulation, but the one time she did get out of bed tonight, it was to call me into the hallway to tell me she just had to hug and kiss me and tell me she loves me. Baby Javan had a tough day today too, but he let Grammy rock him to sleep and napped with me for an hour, then woke up and gave me the sweetest smiles. Treasures all. New year. I dislike resolutions. I'd rather think in terms of where I'd like to be in a year, two years, five years. Some of that is too personal for a public blog. Academically, I'm anxiously approaching a research project that I hope will make a difference in online education. Tonight though, I'm more interested in getting back to my knitting needles. Last night, I finished a knitted jumper for Carina, and she loves it. She wore it to church today, and when she put it on, she made me promise to dance with her at church. We danced. When we were at the store last week, she picked out and fell in love with a brightly variegated yarn. I think I bought enough to make matching sweaters for her and Libby. Every stitch is a prayer and a smile. posted by Annie 11:50 PM | . . .
